I'm taking all the music down...

[X-53mph]

Since I was a kid, making music has been an integral part of my life. I learned the guitar by joining a band and playing Nirvana and Dinosaur Jnr covers. Later, I became the front man of my own bands as well as the guitarist and songwriter in others. Then in my 20s I got signed under my moniker 53mph . I released a few records, had some radio and TV play, was offered management, but I never really broke the big time. I guess because of that I always felt that I had some unresolved business, and so I've been making music under the name 53mph ever since.

In recent years, however, music making has started to feel like a slog. I was never a prolific writer or performer, but I was producing music every week. In the last 4 months I have not written or recorded anything new. I no longer have the drive to keep at it. Add to that the fact that I don't have an audience, I don't have a following, and I have never understood how to crack the social media fan machine (without selling a piece of my soul).  I feel like a stranger in a strange land.

Everything came to a head when at the end of last year I was contacted by a music promoter. I won't mention names, but he had a history of working with big names. We had a zoom chat in which he said he'd be willing to 'put in a shift' pushing my stuff to labels in Europe. We talked about what would be required from me: radio appearances, festival circuits, social media promotion. That's when I realized, I don't really want it. I then had some sessions with a mentor. This was meant to focus my attention onto what my 'brand' was and what I was 'selling', how to build a following on-line etc. The end result is....I've become musically empty. The plan laid out before me looked like a hamster wheel that I could never leave. It was like I'd woken from a dream. So I've decided. enough is enough. I quit.

I used to make music because I loved making music, but these days I can see no point. So I quit.

I'm taking everything off-line except for Bandcamp, which is going to become a mausoleum to 53mph. Soundcloud, YouTube, TikTok, X-Twitter...all gone.

I need to go away and rediscover what it is about making music that I love. I need a fresh start. So this is the end, my friends.

Edited April 16 by X-53mph

[PhonoBrainer]

How old are you? Just curious. Music has been your lifelong love, I can assume. Has it been your main job as well, or a sideline?

I've heard a bit of your opus and found it quite good IMHO, for what it's worth!

Anyway, if you no longer love doing it, I don't blame you for eschewing that hamster wheel.  There are no hamster wheels in labors of love.

[X-53mph]

52 minutes ago, PhonoBrainer said:

How old are you? Just curious. Music has been your lifelong love, I can assume. Has it been your main job as well, or a sideline?

I've heard a bit of your opus and found it quite good IMHO, for what it's worth!

Anyway, if you no longer love doing it, I don't blame you for eschewing that hamster wheel.  There are no hamster wheels in labors of love.

Thanks for the compliment @PhonoBrainer. Truth is, there are millions of people making good stuff out there every day. I'm just one of millions (maybe even billions) and I have to face up to the fact that it's good, but not better than that.

As for my age: I am turning 50 next year, though I don't look it. I've got that youthful Thurston Moore look about me.

I was never able to make music my main job. I've always had a main job in something else, and music has occasionally brought me some nice payments here and there, but nothing spectacular. However, in recent years it's become a loss leader. Stats in the tens even when I push the music. Sites asking me to sign up for this or sign up for that. Pay for plays. Pay for airplay. Pay for promotion. Pay for advise. Everyone wants my money for the promise of exposure. It's one long con. And most importantly, it doesn't make me happy anymore.  

So I quit. 

[Old Joad]

We'll leave a light on for you, in case you find it again☮️

[Grem]

6 hours ago, X-53mph said:

I need to go away and rediscover what it is about making music that I love. I need a fresh start. So this is the end, my friends.

Yep, that's what ya need to do. Just chill for a little while.

Some advice, don't sell anything at least for a year. Maybe two. 

If you just chill, let it come back naturally, you'll remember why you started all this BS.

Rush said it best: Put Aside the alienation, get on with the fascination. The real relation, the underlying need.

It's what you are. You are the one to please.

[Grem]

Just now, Old Joad said:

We'll leave a light on for you, in case you find it again☮️

Well said!!

[fret_man]

I often feel the same way. My main musical goals now are:

• have some fun (but honestly this comes and goes)
• learn something new (currently trying to write a klezmer piece)
• stay out of trouble (idle hands are the devil's playmate)
• be part of something bigger then myself (you can see some of my transcriptions for my guitar ensemble here)
• leave a legacy for my grandkids (I don't want my ancestry.com entry to be empty)

[X-53mph]

5 minutes ago, Grem said:

Some advice, don't sell anything at least for a year. Maybe two. 

Do you mean instruments? Cause I am definitely thinking of selling my Dobro.

The strat and the Acoustic are staying though.

I've already listed some of my mics.

There was once a time when I would buy a new toy to try to reignite my passion for music. That seems to have passed too.

[Grem]

1 minute ago, X-53mph said:

when I would buy a new toy to try to reignite my passion for music. That seems to have passed too.

Yeah, we do things like that to satisfy that "underlying need". But it don't help!! LOL! Give yourself some time and space. 

Like Old Joad said, we'll be here when ya get back.

 

[Notes_Norton]

Sorry to hear that you are burned out on music. I've seen it happen to quite a few. My main advices is don't sell all your instruments. Keep enough so that if you change your mind in the future, you can return. 

My story is opposite.

At 19, I was almost a star. Opening concerts for the people in the Billboard top 10. We were in negotiations with Motown for a record deal, but Motown only wanted to pay 2 cents per record. Out of our royalties they wanted to take exaggerated recording, distribution, and promotional costs. In addition, they wanted to own our name, have all publishing rights, and a non-contributing ghostwriter to take half any songwriting royalties. Our management tried for 2.5 cents and they quit talking.

So I got my disappointment when I was still young, We went back to playing bars, this was before DJs took over singles clubs. So there was money coming in and plenty of pretty girls to try to impress. 

I was never much at writing lyrics, so I've made a life playing other people's music. I'm past retirement age, but still enjoying each and every gig. I married one of those girls who happened to be another musician, and since 1985 we've been gigging as a duo.

But this life is definitely not for everyone. I've seen many of my band buddies quit it entirely, and others put it down for a few years and come back to it. There is more than one right way to go through life.

Enough about me, here is the important part:

Whatever you do to replace the music in your life, I hope it gives you great enjoyment and fulfillment. 

 

Insights and incites by Notes ♫

[craigb]

50 minutes ago, Notes_Norton said:

...here is the important part:

Whatever you do to replace the music in your life, I hope it gives you great enjoyment and fulfillment. 

What Bob said!

I've had several times in my life where something I enjoyed doing became an income source, then work, and then lost it's fun so I stopped.  Life's short enough as it is, take a break and you may find yourself drawn back to making music again.  Or, this might give you the time and space to discover something new entirely!

[kitekrazy1]

  I kinda get it.  Software is becoming more of a chore these days.  Too many jump through the hoops just to use something.  I have all of these installation managers and as you get older if you don't have a universal password for all of them you forget.  Password manager don't always work for them and then you have to create a spreadsheet for your passwords.

  The days of offline DAWs are almost over.

 More is less but very few seem to have that wisdom.

[Bapu]

 

[Jimbo 88]

5 hours ago, X-53mph said:

 Sites asking me to sign up for this or sign up for that. Pay for plays. Pay for airplay. Pay for promotion. Pay for advise. Everyone wants my money for the promise of exposure. It's one long con. And most importantly, it doesn't make me happy anymore.  

So I quit. 

This is the old "Picks and Axes" marketing strategy.   During the California Gold Rush it wasn't the gold minors that made the most money.  it was the ones selling the Picks and Axes.

Yep, Listen, Music is the only way I have made a living for 40+ years and I feel much the same. my time has come and gone and there are huge number of people putting out pretty decent music.  I'm refocusing and creating music that students can learn from.

Edited April 16 by Jimbo 88

[Jesse Screed]

Life is hard.

[Starship Krupa]

You didn't ask for advice, but speaking as someone who has given up making music for years at a time, then come back to it with greater enthusiasm and a different approach, yeah, don't sell your gear. The expensive mics, well maybe. But at least hang on to the minimum.

I approach making music these days like a model railroad. It's fun to do in and of itself, and if someone else hears it and likes it, that's a bonus. To me, it's a way of communicating thoughts and feelings that can't be expressed in other ways. Nostalgia, grief, joy, serenity.

I "hear" things in my head, or on the radio (mostly Soma.fm and KALX, the UC Berkeley station) and I want to make those sounds. So I do. When I finish a piece, it goes up on Bandcamp and YouTube. One thing I tossed off half a dozen years ago is up to over 600 views on YouTube. Woo-hoo! It's like dropping messages in a bottle.

Before the rock star myth descended upon the world, music making was something that was just a part of people's homes. Have a piano, learn to play it, or have friends over who play, sit on the porch with the guitar, making music because it's something cool to do, like painting.

You never know when you'll hear a new (to you) form of music and have it trigger a desire to MAKE SOUNDS LIKE THAT (as happened with messrs. Cobain and Mascis).

I'm enjoying your album right now....

[Shane_B.]

I was in a band at a very early age. It consumed my life. Live bands and places to play started to fall apart, at least in my area, around the mid 90's. It felt like being an uninvited guest somewhere and we knew it was coming to an end.

Recording satisfied that itch. Over the years I took multi year long breaks from it, but I always came back. I'm in one of those breaks now and I'm getting the itch to get back in to it.

I've had several songs get very high on the list for their category on some free streaming services, but I never made a penny on any of it and never took it seriously.

I couldn't imagine a time when I say, ok that's it. I'm selling everything. Especially my main guitar I've had for 41 years.

I have a similar story to Notes Motown story. A friend ofnmine and I signed a contract to do a soundtrack for a movie for a famous singer from the 50' and 60's. He died in a plane crash in the 80's. They put the cart before the horse and when they approached his estate with the idea, they said no to the documentary, and that was the end of that with the stroke of a lawyers pen.

Technology sure can make it more difficult now like kitekrazy said. You can go insane learning it and keeping it running, let alone all the options and ability to manipulate a "real" recording into something perfect. Almost nothing we hear on the radio now is real. I switched back to tape and transferred it to digital to mix and master a while back and that brought back a lot of enjoyment for me.

Good luck with whatever you decide.

[mettelus]

On 4/16/2024 at 12:04 PM, craigb said:

I've had several times in my life where something I enjoyed doing became an income source, then work, and then lost it's fun so I stopped.

^^^^ This one is massive from my perspective. Pretty much everything I am incredibly passionate about I have kept in the "hobby" bucket for the simple reason that I can do what I want, when I want, how I want, and if I don't want, that is perfectly okay too. It is very important to keep in mind what variables are in play and which ones impact the "fun factor" adversely. Hobbies are for fun, so definitely keep that part (i.e., "I loved making music"), but don't feel the least bit bad about kicking the things that make it not fun to the curb and walking away from those aspects.

[John Vere]

Being someone who started in the 60’s with dozens of garage bands playing cover tunes and having fun playing at dances and all that stuff. 

This was a time  when it was possible to actually get out there and score a record deal.  I chose a day job instead and music was just a hobby and getting together with other people like me to jam. This was my big city days. Music was fun and casual. I even bought a Reel to reel and started my recording journey. 

I was like this for about 15 years and we moved to a small community and was immediately grabbed by a local band and hauled off to play at hippie festivals, bars, nightclubs and all that wonderful 80’s stuff. 
My wife was not happy staying at home with the kids while I spent the weekend out of town making my $100!  So I went solo and stayed close to home. I also made $300- $450 this way. Wife was happy and I was still playing. 
What I learned was I had become addicted to playing live. 
Im now 71 and I still get phone calls to go do gigs. 
I still only make $300?  
 

Then I have written over 50 original songs and recorded them since 1993 when I built my first studio.

I would make cassettes and sell a few of them at gigs but overall it was a flop. I might have made a total of $200 selling Tapes and CD’s in my entire lifetime. 
Fast forward to last summer when I went big time and posted 14 songs using DistroKid. So far that has netted me $5.
 

So I feel just like you and I think I’ll just pull them and tell the distributor to keep there lousy $5.

People want to hear my songs they can come to my gigs and I’ll sell them a CD for $2.00 and make more money that way  

I have no clue if the people streaming my song actually like them??  At least when you play to a real audience you get a response.  
I really don’t see the point in releasing music with the new system anymore. 
 

And I read here that there’s probably people stealing my music and releasing it under different names. 

So I can totally see where you are coming from. . 

Edited April 20 by John Vere

[kennywtelejazz]

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Edited April 21 by kennywtelejazz