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Songs you like to schtoop, and you know why....

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I must be out of sync wiv how the kids of today talk ...

What's a "Funyon" and why would I want to "schtoop" it?

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3 hours ago, SteveStrummerUK said:

I must be out of sync wiv how the kids of today talk ...

What's a "Funyon" and why would I want to "schtoop" it?

schtoop = shag

image.png.2f0b3f75042b4fd53897cf73d2718d20.png

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Cherry Pie is well.... Cherry Pie

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I'll get me coat

 

but until I do

 

Pretty Evasive Nonsense Is Scorned

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3 hours ago, SteveStrummerUK said:

I must be out of sync wiv how the kids of today talk ...

What's a "Funyon" and why would I want to "schtoop" it?

It was a reference to another post I made in a different thread where I said I would hurl my Funyun's if I heard another 80's hair metal song. Funyun's are a snack that was popular in the 80's when I was a wee lad. I tried to tie the two 80's references together in a witty fashion but I failed miserably.

Funny though. I remember them being spelled Funion's. But when I looked them up to see if they were still being made the spelling was Funyun's.

Edited by Shane_B.
Fixed typo.
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3 minutes ago, Shane_B. said:

It was a reference to another post I made in a different thread where I said I would hurl my Funyon's if I heard another 80's hair metal song. Funyon's are a snack that was popular in the 80's when I was a wee lad. I tried to tie the two 80's references together in a witty fashion but I failed miserably.

Funny though. I remember them being spelled Funion's. But when I looked them up to see if they were still being made the spelling was Funyon's.

I got a bag  of Funyon's for Christmas :D   

So don't go making fun of us old folks or we shall get our shot-guns and............ Nevermind   ;)

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Funyon's  are one of those snack foods that I can't resist.    So my wife decided this past Christmas to wrap up a bag in a nice big box for me to open. She has been doing this for years as I do to her on a food item we can't resist :D  I got her some candy confectionery that she loves.   The year before I got her Trader Joe's dark chocolate peanut butter cups. 

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2 hours ago, Bapu said:

schtoop = shag

How vile.

There's no need to lower the tone of the place ..... even further.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

(it's spelled 'schtup' over here 😄)

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I wanted to pen a haiku based loosely about this fred.

But I need to know how many syllabubs the word Funyuns has when pronounced in proper American English?

Is it 3, as in  'onions' with an 'F' at the start?

Or 2, as in 'Fun-Yuns'?

 

 

And most importantly of all, literarily speaking, can it be forced to rhyme with p*n*s for extra comedic value?

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Selected horrible Haiku from many years ago (some of what we used to do when we were supposed to be programming! 😁 ).

  Many have stumbled
On the path to victory
  I call them losers

The top of your head
Is easy for me to see
Since you have no legs

    The smiling psychic
Could really define the term
      "Happy Medium"

  I hate the sea birds
That gather all around me
  And shit on my shirt

    Although it's been said
That a stitch in time saves nine
      I say "Use Velcro!"

     The kids on the beach
Were like small pictures of joy
       So I blew them up

   My new house has walls
That are off-white and padded
    Will you come visit?

   The knife came towards me
And spread me from side to side
       I was on a roll

    And now I can't stop
Counting five, seven and five
  And it's all your fault!

    Listen to reason
But take care to remember
  Ears can deceive you

   You reap what you sow
But a few will go farther
   And sew what they rip

 What sound a tree makes
When it falls in a forest
    Is up to the tree

  A thought cast will skip
Off the minds of the shallow
   But sinks in the deep

       Many opinions
Are constructed by the wise
    And sold by the fool

   Timothy Leary
Turned reality into
     Unreality

      Depressing people
Float away from my conscience
    Like ships on the sea

       An optimist feels
That the sands of time gathered
    Would make a nice beach.

      Many have conquered
All foes they have encountered
   But time takes them all

   As long as a man
Is in love with his body
  No one else will be

  When somebody says
Nobody does it like you
They're probably right

      A politician
Is just like a stable boy
  They both shovel crap

  The fellow who hides
Under an outhouse's seat
 Will see lots of shit

         Any who compare
The size of one's balls to strength
    Have not been kicked there

    Sally the spoon and
Freddy the fork went no where
   Unlike Mack the knife

   It is said that those
Who seek for higher meaning
    Will often find it

It is said that those
Who only seek to get high
Will often do it

Echoes from within
Patterns of the universe
Order from Chaos

Enclosed in a sphere
The minute mimics the great:
Singularity

   Schroedinger came by
To ask how my half-life was
  Then he stole my cat!

Would it smell so sweet
If it was known as a fart?
A rose is a rose

   To know is to be
But to be or not to be
Is to know Shakespeare

Edited by craigb

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More!  I guess I made a few of these...  No wonder my projects tended to be turned in late... 😁

  A dove stands for peace
But the bird of a true love
    Would be a swallow

    He was so stupid
That He couldn't even get
  "Hello World" to run!

 Start with a face-off...
But it's not a hockey game
   It's Leper Boxing!

You don't need science
Or a psychic projection
To tell that I'm bored

 Let's go to Graceland
To see our buddy Elvis
I'll bring some shovels

(Leper Haiku anyone? 😜 )

         The leper farmer
Was walking through the corn fields
     And found lots of ears

      The comedian
Performing for the lepers
   Received a big hand

    The leper actress
Was told to go break a leg
   But didn't have one

  An eye for an eye!
The leper rebel shouted
 So they threw him one

 In a leper race
It is usual to be
A head by a foot

Are your feelings hurt?
That wasn't my intention
  Here, have a tissue.

      Skydiving is fun
Unless you try to pack light
   And forget your chute

       A flexible man,
One could tell from how his head
    Was stuck up his a55

     He yelled, I drew:
That's the difference between
   The quick and the dead

Stop it already!
You are driving me crazy
With all this haiku!

      They were arrested
Were George Michael and Pee Wee
    Both caught red-handed

     Yes, relative time
Is a whole lot more fun than
    Time with relatives!

     My future is past
When, just like Christmas, I
     Unwrap the present

     Fat girls can be fun
Put your meat in their ovens
     And see microwaves!

        No harps, just Haiku
Made Steve think "Well, if I'm dead...
        This isn't Heaven!"

😁

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I hate to haiku

A sad form of poetry

Mostly never rhymes

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1 hour ago, User 905133 said:

two

you were answering Steve's question then you should of spelled it Too ;)
 

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2 hours ago, SteveStrummerUK said:

Or 2, as in 'Fun-Yuns'?

 

If you have a whole bag you will be summoned by the Onion Gods and you shall know thy answer :D

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14 hours ago, InstrEd said:

you were answering Steve's question then you should of spelled it Too ;)
 

No, tou.

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