Notes_Norton Posted January 27, 2021 Author Share Posted January 27, 2021 Why was Cinderella thrown off the basketball team? She ran away from the ball. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mandolin Picker Posted January 28, 2021 Share Posted January 28, 2021 1 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Notes_Norton Posted January 29, 2021 Author Share Posted January 29, 2021 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
craigb Posted January 29, 2021 Share Posted January 29, 2021 1 hour ago, Notes_Norton said: Reminds me of someone I know up here who's still fruit... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Notes_Norton Posted January 30, 2021 Author Share Posted January 30, 2021 I guess he figured if he painted that, he'd be in the dough. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Notes_Norton Posted January 30, 2021 Author Share Posted January 30, 2021 Q. What do dentists call their x-rays? A. Tooth pics Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Notes_Norton Posted January 31, 2021 Author Share Posted January 31, 2021 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Notes_Norton Posted February 2, 2021 Author Share Posted February 2, 2021 I didn't think wearing orthopedic shoes would help, but I stand corrected. 1 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RobertWS Posted February 4, 2021 Share Posted February 4, 2021 A man had an argument with his wife and got so angry, he stuffed half a box of cornflakes down her throat which killed her. The judge gave him a harsh sentence because the man was a cereal killer. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Notes_Norton Posted February 4, 2021 Author Share Posted February 4, 2021 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Notes_Norton Posted February 9, 2021 Author Share Posted February 9, 2021 People are usually shocked when the find out I'm not a very good electrician. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Notes_Norton Posted February 11, 2021 Author Share Posted February 11, 2021 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bats brew Posted February 11, 2021 Share Posted February 11, 2021 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bats brew Posted February 11, 2021 Share Posted February 11, 2021 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bats brew Posted February 11, 2021 Share Posted February 11, 2021 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Notes_Norton Posted February 11, 2021 Author Share Posted February 11, 2021 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Notes_Norton Posted February 14, 2021 Author Share Posted February 14, 2021 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
craigb Posted February 16, 2021 Share Posted February 16, 2021 Found some fresh ones (just don't step in 'em!). ? Dad, are we pyromaniacs? Yes, we arson. What do you call a pig with laryngitis? Disgruntled. Writing my name in cursive is my signature move. Why do bees stay in their hives during winter? Swarm. If you’re bad at haggling, you’ll end up paying the price. Just so everyone’s clear, I’m going to put my glasses on. A commander walks into a bar and orders everyone around. I lost my job as a stage designer. I left without making a scene. Never buy flowers from a monk. Only you can prevent florist friars. How much did the pirate pay to get his ears pierced? A buccaneer. I once worked at a cheap pizza shop to get by. I kneaded the dough. How can you tell if someone is a pirate? They just arrrr. I lost my girlfriend’s audiobook, and now I’ll never hear the end of it. Why is ‘dark’ spelled with a k and not c? Because you can’t see in the dark. Why is it unwise to share your secrets with a clock? Well, time will tell. When I told my contractor I didn’t want carpeted steps, they gave me a blank stare. Bono and The Edge walk into a Dublin bar and the bartender says, “Oh no, not U2 again.” Prison is just one word to you, but for some people, it’s a whole sentence. Scientists got together to study the effects of alcohol on a person’s walk, and the result was staggering. I’m trying to organize a hide and seek tournament, but good players are really hard to find. I got over my addiction to chocolate, marshmallows, and nuts. I won’t lie, it was a rocky road What do you say to comfort a friend who’s struggling with grammar? There, their, they’re. I went to the toy store and asked the assistant where the Schwarzenegger dolls are and he replied, “Aisle B, back.” What did the surgeon say to the patient who insisted on closing up their own incision? Suture self. I’ve started telling everyone about the benefits of eating dried grapes. It’s all about raisin awareness. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
craigb Posted February 16, 2021 Share Posted February 16, 2021 And a bonus that should be very appropriate for this forum! My friends and I have named our band ‘Duvet’. It’s a cover band. ?? 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Notes_Norton Posted February 16, 2021 Author Share Posted February 16, 2021 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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