kennywtelejazz

Man ! what a story . Some people have all the Luck . Kenny

It was .....The Air Quality of Portland has been Rated The Worst in The Planet . Since the air quality recently cleared up here in The Portland area , Now I have no freaking idea what we are talking about Since I'm a Man ! I ain't asking for directions . I don't want my Man Card Pulled ...? Kenny

You Da Man You sound like an interesting guy to take camping because the camp sight will be free of all bugs and critters .. We will have to remember to bring an extra tent just for you ? Kenny

You should feel better Robert once you wash your eyes out with our healing waters . Kenny

Like i said before I'm OK talking about a watermelon ....but that local chick ? forgetaboutit......if I ever went there I would take that INFO to the Grave with me . Kenny

Who you gonna call to tap that ASSZZ Look no further you sexy green blob . Here's you guy ! Oh Man ! Jim Morrison was right when he sang the lyric People are Strange At least we are all safe for tonight and we can make it over the stonewall together for a change . Kenny

? Actually I wouldn't mind getting a pair of those pants ...that hat has to go . Are those what you wear when you have your famous rooting patooting egg salad sandwiches ? Kenny

Judging by the size of the hole it looks like somebody with a real small pecker took out their sexual frustrations on that thing ... I know it wasn't me because the last time I did something like that was before I got sober ( in 83 ) and it was with a watermelon .... Kenny

Yes I hate to say it but the quarantine messed me up too ...Today I went to try on what used to be my fat pair of non stretch jeans and I was greeted with couple of inches of belly . There was no way for me to close the waistline and zip up the zipper ...Oh well it looks like it's gonna stay sweat pants and stretch jeans for now . I hope you have and use a bidet often because butt hole cleanliness is real important when you don't wear traditional pants ...more than once over the years I have caught a brown racing strip on the inside of my jeans ...yeah that might be TMI but I don't plan on marking my furniture with my but hole secretion's any time soon ... ? Amen Brother you tell em . Kenny

Kenny

this one looks interesting Kenny

Kenny

? I'm very lucky to have gotten the surgery the doctors did for me . I couldn't play the guitar for almost a year unless I only played in one fretting zone / area of the neck . That happened in 2009 and it was my introduction to sleeping on a Lazy Boy ... I would love to be a light weight again as far as my actual weight go's ...I kid you not , every time I hop on my scale I sing these words in my best atonal voice Tell me lies Tell me sweet little lies (Tell me lies, tell me, tell me lies) Remember Steven Seagal when he was a skinny and a tough looking bad ***** ? I used to be thin and in shape like him ....Now that he is all Porked Out and looking the way he does , I'm catching up to him there too. I may have to take the 25 pairs of jeans in assorted sizes I can no longer fit into anymore and just donate them to Good Will .. Kenny

Well , you can make your own if you want . I used to have a kinky G F back East ...we used to enjoy playing tricks on each other ... We had this habit of eating food in bed so one day I took a half eaten can of Planters mixed nuts and replaced the nuts with something else like uncooked Mac & Cheese elbows w out the cheese to give the can some weight and content ..then I bent over and ripped a wet juicy one right into the can and closed the lid . I did this while she was in the bathroom . About 10 mins later she reached for the can of mixed nuts and she was greeted with a fresh pungent aroma when she opened up the lid ? she actually like the joke so much we tried to find out how long the can would hold the stink ....I remember with just a regular can with the plastic top 3 hours seemed to be the max time ...I have heard that an air tight container could last a real long time ... Kenny

Craigb! thanks for the kind thought . my wallet is currently on life support . At least I got my car running again ...it needed a new starter . Kenny

Sheens ! your a bad bad boy ? Or when the holiday season rolls around you can always send Strummy! one of these https://sendajart.com/collections/jarts/products/jart-fart-in-a-jar Kenny

Kenny

Yeah Tim ! dogs going nuts while watching TV is some funny stuff ...I played with a Bass Player once that had to get hair cuts all the time because they had to trim the back of his neck . His back hairs went all the way up to above his lower neck line ? Me personally , I was a bald eagle even when I was in high school ...I ran track and I hated taking showers with the team after practice because I had 3 hairs on my chest and only 4 or 5 hairs on my balls ....back then being able to grow a mustache or having a hairy chest was sort of a status symbol ...fast forward to today ...I still don't have much of any hair on my chest ..at least I got more than 4 or 5 hairs nowadays at my southern hemisphere Yeah ...I know ....TMI ? Hey Dave ! Even when I had Duke I used to like watching pet videos every so often ... Those dancing cockatoos on u tube look like heavy metal lead singers when they bop their heads up and down to the music ... This bird runs out of steam after 30 seconds, gets a second wind and hits it one more time . I didn't know you had such problems w your sleep and your back ... I'm having major sleep problems over here and my doctor wants me to spend a night in the hospital for a clinical sleep study ....I haven't even owned a bed or slept in a bed since 2009 .. My left arm is one third titanium right up to my shoulder from a bad cycling accident and the only way I could sleep was in a Lazy boy style chair ... Then Duke went and broke my other arm right near the shoulder about 3 years ago by accident .I had to get a new chair because my old one broke . Both times during the physical healing phase I had to relearn how to play the guitar because of the pain and a restricted range of motion for both of my arms .. all the best, Kenny

Kenny

I used to love watching T V w Duke ....Since I no longer have a dog I wind up watching other peoples dogs on u tube watching T V to fill the gap . This same dog is a riot ! He really pays attention as if he was there . Kenny

Look how cute that little puppy is . Someday ! . Here's a pic of Duke and I during better days . Hey Craigb ! I used to live over by where that park is . Very nice neighborhood . all the best Kenny

?️ ? Gulp ?️Testing one, two, three .... ? ? I guess it happened because I'm a bit of an A Hole ? Kenny

Kenny

Gswitz ! looking at your new guitar made me track down my current 335 style guitar ... I bought this guitar brand new in 2000 from ABC Music in Burbank when I lived in L.A. She is a Korean DeArmond (Guild ) Starfire IV in natural ...the lighting in my pics do not do this guitar justice at all ... Since I just took these pics a few mins ago , I might as well throw in my SG ... Kenny

Wow that Godfrey is super funny . ..I love his Arnold in this Video Kenny