Double points:
The Jazz Butcher - Nothing Special
This one comes with a parental warning: "Explicit lyrics". I am at a complete loss as to what they think is explicit in the lyrics (other than he misspelled becan as bacon). Can anyone spot what's explicit here please?
Lyrics
He walks like a prefect
I bet all his clothes were made in Thailand
Don't like the look of him at all
I'm on this train again
Sick and tired of these dumb procedures
Don't like his watch; don't want to know him
And I ain't gonna wash
And I ain't gonna dream
And I ain't gonna talk
And I ain't gonna scheme
And I ain't going to do a single thing
Gonna be the man who sat down
And I ain't gonna wash
And I ain't gonna shower
Just sit here waiting for terminal hour
And I ain't going to do a single thing
Gonna be the man who sat down
He's got a notebook
There's snow on the ground
And there's bacon in my lunch
They always say that trouble comes in threes
And my friends say that I sulk 'coz I'm a drunk
And I know all these passengers agree
But I don't want the sea
And I don't want the beach
And everything I do what is out of reach
And I ain't gonna do a single thing
Gonna be the man who sat down
And I ain't gonna laugh
And I ain't gonna play
I wish I could be a thousand miles away
And the words are all my business
Gonna be the man who sat down
I dreamed I saw my neighbours jumping from a thirteen story window
But in the station there they were
The disappointment turns me 'round, of course,
But I can live with all those things
The train can do the moving
I'm not gonna stir
And I ain't gonna wash
And I ain't gonna dream
And I ain't gonna jump
And I ain't gonna scream
And I ain't gonna move again
Gonna be the man who sat down
And I ain't gonna read
And I ain't gonna smoke
And I refuse point-blank to understand your jokes
So I ain't gonna move again
I've seen the writing on the engine and it says:
The name of this train is the Nothing Special
The name of this train is the Nothing Special
The name of this train is the Nothing Special
That's all it says
The name of this train is the Nothing Special
It's just an ordinary train
A very ordinary train
Just like all the others; just a very ordinary train
