crooked people

[timboalogo]

I'm hesitant to put this song up for song and mix review. There are so many good players here that I find it embarrassing to let folks listen to my stuff.

That said, this song is way heavier than the synth based stuff I've posted in the past, both musically and lyrically. And because it is bass and drum based, I'm wondering if I've got the mix right. In fact, I think not.

So please have a listen and tell me how this sounds.

Timbo

crooked people in the shadows
mouths overflow with lies untold
crooked people hoard our secrets
crooked people seen too much for too long

they've forgotten more than we've ever known
and the crows cry pain, pain, pain 
they weave straw baskets to cradle their lies
and the crows cry pain, pain, pain 

crooked people spin the promise
fractured wisdom for the gathering crowds
crooked people sow the sickness
crooked people done too much for too long

crooked people buried our wisdom
crows mock the nameless faces in the ground
crooked people sow the sickness
crooked people've run the farm for too long

they've forgotten more than we've ever known
and the crows cry pain, pain, pain 
they reaped the harvest, salted our crooked bones
and the crows cry pain, pain, pain 

Edited Saturday at 09:26 PM by timboalogo
147 views and 0 plays, so I remixed it

[mark skinner]

I thought that was quite creative and for sure got my attention. I'm not well versed in that genre and anything I would suggest would probably reduce the effect of what you are aiming for.  That is except for the "keys" lead section early in the song. I think they could be brought down a bit giving a little more balance in that section.   Enjoyed it ..     mark

[timboalogo]

Thanks for the listen Mark. I try to make up for my lack of musical talent with creativity.

I'm not versed in the genre either and couldn't tell you what it is. When I'm writing I try not to censor any ideas that come to me.

I'll try to rebalance the piano bit (it's just Scaler) on the next remix.

Thanks for your ears,

Tim