You Shaped Hole in My Heart - new original

[daryl1968]

Hi nice forum folk I hope you are all well.

Here's a new song that Ed Kocol (Bapu) and I wrote and the fab James Griffiths (JamesG1213) played on. Baps also plays bass and the current Mrs Daryl1968 sings backing vocals.

Nits and crits welcome - lyrics below link

You Shaped Hole in My Heart
Written by Ed Kocol and Daryl Greenway
Guitar James Griffiths
Bass Ed Kocol
Vocals, keyboards etc by Staypress
V1
Starting from nothing was what we had
We never saw it as good or bad
For better or worse, we gave it our all
Just how could we fall?
V2
Same old story we wouldn't last
But all the glory is in the past
It's you and me in heaven on earth
We'll show them what we're worth
Prechorus
But I need to speak my mind
I don't mean to be unkind
Chorus
i told you right from the start, there's a you shaped hole in my heart
V3
We kept calm and carried on
Creating the words to our song
Verse after verse continued to flow
As we put on our show
Prechorus
Chorus

Bloody lovely solo here
Chorus to end

[markno999]

Daryl,

Good song, very upbeat and enjoyable listen.   Performances are all very well done.

No crits other than the toms seems a bit boomy/ringy in the mix.   If using SD3 try the envelope settings in the kit piece properties for taming.     Otherwise good.

Regards

[Lynn Wilson]

Daryl, you and Ed have cooked up a terrific song!  The words and music are a perfect pair, and all the performances are polished.  You have raised the bar, yet again, for the rest of us

[mark skinner]

Such a Nice Clean mix. I thought this was Great writing and a Steller performance by all..   mark

[daryl1968]

On 4/18/2023 at 8:39 PM, markno999 said:

Daryl,

Good song, very upbeat and enjoyable listen.   Performances are all very well done.

No crits other than the toms seems a bit boomy/ringy in the mix.   If using SD3 try the envelope settings in the kit piece properties for taming.     Otherwise good.

Regards

Thanks so much Mark. 

Did Bapu pay you to mention the ringing tom thing lol? We had a 'disagreement' on it - he (and you) were probably right 

 

[Wookiee]

Classic Greenaway and Bapu work, nice guitar from James.  Production sound nice here, lyrics nicely written good vocal presentation.

Worthy of a  I think.

[markno999]

8 hours ago, daryl1968 said:

Thanks so much Mark. 

Did Bapu pay you to mention the ringing tom thing lol? We had a 'disagreement' on it - he (and you) were probably right 

Daryl,  no bribery was involved?.     I am a fan of 70's tom sounds so like them dry and no ring.   It just stood out because the rest of the track is so clean.    If you are going for a vibe with the toms holding out longer you could probably pull back the envelope if using SD3 and then use a nice reverb with HPF to have them ring a little longer without the whole drum head ringing.   Just a thought.  

Regards

[daryl1968]

16 minutes ago, markno999 said:

Daryl,  no bribery was involved?.     I am a fan of 70's tom sounds so like them dry and no ring.   It just stood out because the rest of the track is so clean.    If you are going for a vibe with the toms holding out longer you could probably pull back the envelope if using SD3 and then use a nice reverb with HPF to have them ring a little longer without the whole drum head ringing.   Just a thought.  

Regards

yeah this tom was from a weird drum sound set from Battery (Native Instruments) - I'm not sure what I was thinking.

This song started very differently to how it ended up and that tom was a hanger on from the previous incarnation 

[Bapu]

6 minutes ago, daryl1968 said:

This song started very differently to how it ended up and that tom was a hanger on from the previous incarnation 

Time for an "unscheduled disassembly"?

[treesha]

Great song ! all the ppl/elements are very good and together very very good!  Enjoyed it all. Personally I would like the bass up a tiny bit louder, just me.

[Larry T.]

Well put together all around. Arrangement, playing, mix????

[Johnbee58]

You sure know how to write a pop song.  Lots of greats twists & turns.  Lyrics are clever.  Nice and tight performances by all.

?John B

[Bajan Blue]

Hi Guys

Great Track? - my only comment would be on the toms - definitely a bit on the boomy side!

Apart from that, this really is good and I enjoyed it a lot

Cool stuff

Nigel

 

[daryl1968]

On 4/18/2023 at 10:24 PM, Lynn Wilson said:

Daryl, you and Ed have cooked up a terrific song!  The words and music are a perfect pair, and all the performances are polished.  You have raised the bar, yet again, for the rest of us

Thanks so much Lynn. We must be overdue a colab mate.....

[Ross S]

Very nice tune! Catchy hooky melody, good clean mix. Great job!! ???

[daryl1968]

On 4/19/2023 at 12:32 AM, mark skinner said:

Such a Nice Clean mix. I thought this was Great writing and a Steller performance by all..   mark

Thanks so much Mark

[SUPAREELS]

Clean and catchy performance, great to hear James is still playing ... I don't have a prob with the toms ...fits the song just fine (you can pm me with the cheque  Bapu)

ATB

Steve

[FreeEarCandy]

Snappy catchy tempo. You have a good singing voice for this kind of tune. Everything else sound good too. 

[steve@baselines.com]

Cool tune - thanks for posting lyrics.

[Makke]

An enjoyable melodic song.    Good recording and sounds.