Critical Chameleon Posted July 6, 2020 Share Posted July 6, 2020 (edited) Hey guys, Hope you're all doing well Got a new track I've been working on that I'd really appreciate feedback on if you got a few minutes to spare. EDIT: Song all done now and fully mastered! Intro Hey bae This is all for you I got something to say And it goes something like this Verse 1 I've been trying, to paint a perfect world But as I try I only get a purple blur I say the dumbest things, when feeling blue I'm using too much red when I'm coloring I don't know why cuz there's no need to draw no picture I got you here and that is all that I could wish for I don't show it enough, you ain't feeling my art Well here's a key to my heart, now I'm opening up Intro to chorus For all the times that you've doubted me (baby) If it's really that hard to see Well if it is turn the sound up hear me out now If it is turn the sound up hear me out now (baby) As I'm I singing this loud and free Chorus I love you I love you I love you baby, yay, yay, ooh I love you (Yeah, believe it boo) I love you (And everything you do) I love you baby, yay, yay, ooh Verse 2 Tryna get this on your mind with such a catchy tune But if a song isn't enough then I'm rap it too I love you, everything that I'm attracted to You kinda gotta it you're the whole entire package boo The sweetest rack of boobs, your body's fit, that head of yours Well, it's fantastic too, much more than it gets credit for Your brain's amazing, you're so clever if I never swore I wouldn't rate then I would say you couldn't get a better score I wish I said it more Intro to chorus For all the times that you've doubted me (baby) If it's really that hard to see Well if it is turn the sound up hear me out now If it is turn the sound up hear me out now (baby) As I'm I singing this loud and free Chorus I love you I love you I love you baby, yay, yay, ooh I love you (Yeah, believe it boo) I love you (And everything you do) I love you baby, yay, yay, ooh Break Hey yeeeeeeah, ahaaaa I love you baby, you're amazing I had a taste and now I'm craving Aahaaa, ah yeah You make me crazy, I want you daily There is no maybe, you're my lady Verse 3 At times you're asking me why, we're on a path you and I You have me scratching my mind, I'm attached to your life Cuz you're supportive and kind, and that's a draft to describe Your caring nature, babe your major compassionate side Plus you're adventurous of course, and your fashion is fine I love that courage of yours, it's really matching your drive You never lie, we’re playing games, but just on laptops online I feel alive you're making me smile when we are passing the time I love your laughter, kicking back, relaxing, chatter even if I'm acting I don't but I do in fact and every dish you do is smashing Yeah, your food's fantastic, you got a juicy ***** well It's not just the booty you're a beauty, yeah you're truly dazzling No make-up needed to be catching my eye I'll eat you up bae, but hey, I gotta ration my rhymes I hate to say it but the beat is fast it's flashing me by Sixteen bars spit and this was just a fraction of why I'm the happiest guy Intro to chorus For all the times that you've doubted me (baby) If it's really that hard to see Well if it is turn the sound up hear me out now If it is turn the sound up hear me out now (baby) As I'm I singing this loud As I'm I singing this loud As I'm I singing this loud and free Chorus I love you I love you I love you baby, yay, yay, ooh I love you (Yeah, believe it boo) I love you (And everything you do) I love you baby, yay, yay, ooh Outro And it feels good Yeah I love you baby Now and forever Never doubt it Cuz it feels good Edited July 22, 2020 by Critical Chameleon 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mark skinner Posted July 9, 2020 Share Posted July 9, 2020 I really liked the groove of this and you did a great job on the vocals. Don't listen to rap but I think you did a cross genre on this one , enjoyed it , Good job. mark ps.. "wash away" needs posting. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
David Sprouse Posted July 9, 2020 Share Posted July 9, 2020 killer lyrics. enjoyed this. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lynn Wilson Posted July 9, 2020 Share Posted July 9, 2020 This held my interest all the way through, and I'm impressed at the punchiness of the track which would make me want to dance. The production is very professional, so congrats! Encore Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Critical Chameleon Posted July 9, 2020 Author Share Posted July 9, 2020 Thanks a lot guys! Means a ton to hear. We've (me and the guy doing the production) have actually been doing some changes which have lifted the song even further. But I think I'll wait posting until the master :) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Grem Posted July 9, 2020 Share Posted July 9, 2020 This took me by surprise. Just did not expect to here a Rap song, that sounded so spacious, lots of atmosphere. And a great beat too. Good vocal performance. 8 hours ago, mark skinner said: ps.. "wash away" needs posting. Totally agree. This song is a winner here. I'd buy this. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DeeringAmps Posted July 11, 2020 Share Posted July 11, 2020 On 7/9/2020 at 3:35 PM, Grem said: did not expect to here hear a Rap song, that sounded so spacious, lots of atmosphere Really good mix. Not my genre but On 7/9/2020 at 12:08 PM, Lynn said: held my interest all the way ? tom Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bjornpdx Posted July 12, 2020 Share Posted July 12, 2020 You'll probably get a lot of "not what I usually listen to" around here, me included, but have to say that I liked it. Very infectious energy and toe-tapping beat. Cool lyrics too (never heard "boobs" in a love song before ☺️). Nice job. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Critical Chameleon Posted July 22, 2020 Author Share Posted July 22, 2020 Really happy to hear all of this guys! Big thanks It's great to hear when your hard work pays off. I have the song fully mastered now. There are some improvements from before (mainly break and outro). Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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