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Posted

A man took his sick dog to the vet. Vet picks up dog and looks at him.

Vet- I believe I'm going to  have to put him down

Dog owner- OMG!!! WHY!!!!

Vet- He's getting heavy.

 

stooges.jpg

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Posted

Man takes his dog to the vet, says the dog has been acting listless. Vet prescribes vitamins.

Vitamins? the man said, that's the dumbest thing I've ever heard. I want a second opinion!

So the vet brings in a cat, who walks around the dog and then looks up at the vet and nods. Yep, says the vet. Vitamins.

WTF? I want a third opinion!

So the vet brings in a Labrador retriever, who sniffs the patient and nods to the doc. Yep, says the vet. That clinches it, and hands the man a bill for $300.

300?!? why so high?

Says the vet: don't blame me. You're the one who demanded the cat scan and the lab test.

 

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Posted
10 minutes ago, bitflipper said:

Says the vet: don't blame me. You're the one who demanded the cat scan and the lab test.

Just think if he wanted a Multi-Poo test ?

Posted (edited)

I guess the social distancing thing went away for these guys? 

If we are to stay 6ft away, how will they make babies in the future?

Edited by Starise
Posted (edited)

If your young and fit, with the right amount of pressure, you should be able to make the distance to deliver the magic milk. But for some of the older guys around here, well, lets just say it's not an in-gene-ious solution.

Edited by Tezza
Posted

 

29 minutes ago, Tezza said:

If your young and fit, with the right amount of pressure, you should be able to make the distance to deliver the magic milk. But for some of the older guys around here, well, lets just say it's not an in-gene-ious solution.

Since you say "if" I can see that. Plenty of unhealthy young people and healthy older people. In your line of work you probably only see the unhealthy ones. Roight?

In any case.....gravity can be your friend.

Posted
6 hours ago, Starise said:

I guess the social distancing thing went away for these guys? 

If we are to stay 6ft away, how will they make babies in the future?

If they can't figure it out, they shouldn't breed!

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Posted

I can't talk like one.  I  understand them most of the time.

Which is better, a wise illegible  statement  or a statement devoid of wisdom we  understand?

Posted
3 hours ago, Starise said:

Which is better, a wise illegible  statement  or a statement devoid of wisdom we  understand?

Buffoonery.  Preferably of the puerile variety.

(Duh!?)

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