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Yo guys,

Posted the text a while back ago under another nick - got no response :D Trying again with the song this time. I appreciate any feedback!

This is yet to be masterd, but unless you have anything to add we feel like the mix is done.

Intro

"This isn't good enough"
"You're *****ing useless"
"Tell that bitch off"
"Cut her *****ing head off"
"You're never gonna make it"
"You don't have what it takes"

Chorus

I hear voices calling, in my head they're shouting
Telling me these stories, in my head I'm drowning
Bla, bla, bla there's no day without it
I've gone crazy and I doubt that there's a way around it

Verse 1

Man I'm sick of it, this feels ridiculous
I have a flu where all I do must be meticulous
("Not true"), alright let me rescript this bit
I have no clue how many times that I've rewritten it

I guess precise, nitpicking that's just slightly fitting
Those definitions won't suffice for the life I'm living
.............I have guides and they're unforgiving
I'm fighting off my Hydes but they run this building ("we own it")

This building I've built, the prison I'm in
A system full of bugs always itching my skin
Look............. I can't be satisfied
No matter what I cook I have an appetite

For more that's why I brush 'till my teeth fall out
That's why I'm crushing all my buttons 'till I scream out loud
.............My recipes have a piece of doubt
Cuz that's the way that it must taste to keep my demons proud ("good boy")

Chorus

I hear voices calling, in my head they're shouting
Telling me these stories, in my head I'm drowning
Bla, bla, bla there's no day without it
I've gone crazy and I doubt that there's a way around it

I hear voices calling, in my head they're shouting
Telling me these stories, in my head I'm drowning
Bla, bla, bla there's no day without it
I'm a crazy mother *****er there's no way around it

Verse 2

Sometimes I lie, but here's an actual fact
I've had a about a million irrational acts
So when I'm chilling I relax in a bath full of ash
From the bridges that I've burnt in my laughable past

I've grown, my path, is still exposed to smolder
Though, a lot of dough's been loaded in my broken toaster
I'm older, though opposed to homer
My show is still alive ("doh"), the joke's not over

Yeah I smell funny, honey, it's my only odor
I repel, I don't troll, I'm a lonely ogre
Sure you can come for some homemade yogurt
With this tool though you're screwing with a roller coaster ("huh?")

It may be fun but it's a scary ride ("why?")
Ride it too much and you'll be terrified ("why?")
There's no such thing as a merry wife
"Cuz we're in charge and we ain't ever gonna share this guy" ("aaaaaaaaaaaah")

Chorus

I hear voices calling, in my head they're shouting
Telling me these stories, in my head I'm drowning
Bla, bla, bla there's no day without it
I've gone crazy and I doubt that there's a way around it

I hear voices calling, in my head they're shouting
Telling me these stories, in my head I'm drowning
Bla, bla, bla there's no day without it
I'm a crazy mother *****er there's no way around it

Break

There are things that I've said that I've said i wouldn't
With strings I am led to do things I shouldn't
Singing in my head like enchanted I lose it
I attach to the threads and I dance to their music (x2)

Verse 3

So, this day at work while I was jotting words
It suddenly occurred that I got such an urge
I'm not a perv, but yo I need to touch some girls
With breasts or not, I don't give a ***** I'd jerk

Off to furry sheep, just let me squeeze some butt
It's so absurd I dream, of all this freaky stuff
Like serving free drinks after I pee in cups
Like... running up in churches to kick jesus nuts

And beating pups, ***** this beef needs to stop
This isn't me it's just a piece of my demons' plot
Evil *****s, you hear? "We're right next to you"
Don't I already have enough regrets produced?

"We bet you do, but you're a co-pilot"
"And this flight of ours is on a low mileage"
"If we want you to be vile there is no niceness"
"You just shut the ***** up when you're told quiet"

Chorus

I hear voices calling, in my head they're shouting
Telling me these stories, in my head I'm drowning
Bla, bla, bla there's no day without it
I've gone crazy and I doubt that there's a way around it

I hear voices calling, in my head they're shouting
Telling me these stories, in my head I'm drowning
Bla, bla, bla there's no day without it
I'm a crazy mother *****er there's no way around it

Outro

Damn, this shit sounds good as fu...
"No... it doesn't"

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The only time I listen to this music genre is when it's coming from the car next to me at a traffic light, and they all sound the same to me.
But being a lyrics guy I gotta say the composition, the meter and rhyming is really good. I wouldn't use the same language, but that's the way it is lately. The demon-in-charge bit is done very well. Creepy but good. I like the co-pilot reference. There's a lot going on in the background which keeps things moving and there's a bunch of stuff I don't understand, but that's okay.

I'm not a fan of this genre and you haven't converted me, but I do like what you did here.
Thanks for posting.

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Posted (edited)

So true critical chameleon (your lyrics)  It's always somethin-else aint it.  Loved your song.

Edited by David Sprouse

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On 4/25/2020 at 10:35 AM, bjornpdx said:

I gotta say the composition, the meter and rhyming is really good

Bjorn pretty well sums it up. Not my genre, but props my man.

On 4/25/2020 at 4:52 AM, Critical Chameleon said:

This is yet to be masterd mastered

Pretty loud now, don't over squish it; just my nickel98 as far as advice goes...

props indeed!

t

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38 minutes ago, DeeringAmps said:

Bjorn pretty well sums it up. Not my genre, but props my man.

Pretty loud now, don't over squish it; just my nickel98 as far as advice goes...

props indeed!

t

Thanks!

I forgot to mention it, but this version has a booster plugin on it which is why it is loud. It's not professionally mastered though. 

  • Like 1

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Not my thing, mix wise it sounds OK here on my Adam's A7x's I with Tom do not over squish it.

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Posted (edited)
49 minutes ago, RobertWS said:

Doesn't this genre usually have a lot more low end? 

 

The guy who has mixed it might have limited it because I've told him I've never liked when bass takes over. My amateurish opinion is that I prefer mid range. 

Edited by Critical Chameleon

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Again, not my genre but I think the mix is good.

While I would expect more low end in this genre, the bass in this mix is still clear and well defined - it's certainly not lacking.

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