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Keith Wilby

A Woman Scorned

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Posted (edited)

Recently completed, I hope you like it but critiques invited - I might be old but never too old to learn.

A woman has hired a private detective to spy on the activities of another woman she suspects is cheating with her partner. Fill in your own back story :)

Edited by Keith Wilby
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Great! Nice well written and arranged song Keith. The vocals sound a bit weird, almost like they have a phaser on them. Your vocals are great so you could try adding an additional track with a cleaner (less fx) lead vocal.

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19 minutes ago, kloon said:

Great! Nice well written and arranged song Keith. The vocals sound a bit weird, almost like they have a phaser on them. Your vocals are great so you could try adding an additional track with a cleaner (less fx) lead vocal.

Thanks kloon, you're right, there is a phaser on the vocal but I was trying to add a bit of mystery and a dash of sinister-ness, but if it's missing the mark then I might try something else ... or even nothing :)

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12 minutes ago, Keith Wilby said:

Thanks kloon, you're right, there is a phaser on the vocal but I was trying to add a bit of mystery and a dash of sinister-ness, but if it's missing the mark then I might try something else ... or even nothing :)

You should definitely mix your vocals the way you want and be faithful to your own creative process. Just make sure that you dont drown / hide them in too much fx cause you´re uncomfortable with your own voice.  Your voice is great! :)

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Very cool.  Yeah, I also think the effect on the vocals distract from a well performed part.😊

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Keith
Cool tune and not your average subject matter for a song. I think the vocal fx could be backed off a bit mainly to help the clarity of the lyrics. The vocal seemed to be competing too much with the instruments so maybe raise the volume. There was a brass instrument in the intro that didn't come in again, at least I didn't notice it. (Maybe too nit-picky there and just a matter of taste.) I think the end needs a definite ending and not a fadeout.

Good job on the song. I like it.

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48 minutes ago, bjornpdx said:

Keith
Cool tune and not your average subject matter for a song. I think the vocal fx could be backed off a bit mainly to help the clarity of the lyrics. The vocal seemed to be competing too much with the instruments so maybe raise the volume. There was a brass instrument in the intro that didn't come in again, at least I didn't notice it. (Maybe too nit-picky there and just a matter of taste.) I think the end needs a definite ending and not a fadeout.

Good job on the song. I like it.

Many thanks for the comments. I'm taking on board the vocal fx comments, the brass ensemble plays beneath the vocal in all the choruses as well as the intro, and wouldn't you know it, I used to have a punchy little ending instead of a fade but I thought it was too abrupt. I'll see if I can come up with a compromise.

All good feedback and it's much appreciated.

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On 1/6/2020 at 12:47 PM, Keith Wilby said:

Recently completed, I hope you like it but critiques invited - I might be old but never too old to learn.

A woman has hired a private detective to spy on the activities of another woman she suspects is cheating with her partner. Fill in your own back story :)

Really interesting theme really like it  , the vocal phasing just a tad to much but still a good listen .cheer´s

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Nice bit of songwriting here! Interesting story line, well told.
The vocal effects are fine IMHO; your song, your production.
I just need a bit more "realism". The midi guitar solo; I play guitar, 'nuff said.
The brass patch, hey I struggle mightily here too so; "let he who has the great brass library throw the first critique"; right?
The hats are great, the snare, we need some ghost notes, a "pickup up" here and there;
not just the obligatory tom fill every verse>chorus>verse>bridge transition. (run on sentence, I know)
I like the tune, this is a great demo, these are the areas I would concentrate on if I'm behind the glass on this one...

Tom

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Great song!  It has a great story, good instrumentation and production, arrangement, etc.  The  vocal is indeed very good and personally I kind of like the Fx on it.  Oh yes - almost forgot, I like that strong bass line that runs through it.

Nice one!

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Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned - this song represents that well - nice job.

The mix sounded good to me - everything was clear in the mix.

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On 1/8/2020 at 1:33 PM, DeeringAmps said:

Nice bit of songwriting here! Interesting story line, well told.
The vocal effects are fine IMHO; your song, your production.
I just need a bit more "realism". The midi guitar solo; I play guitar, 'nuff said.
The brass patch, hey I struggle mightily here too so; "let he who has the great brass library throw the first critique"; right?
The hats are great, the snare, we need some ghost notes, a "pickup up" here and there;
not just the obligatory tom fill every verse>chorus>verse>bridge transition. (run on sentence, I know)
I like the tune, this is a great demo, these are the areas I would concentrate on if I'm behind the glass on this one...

Tom

Great input Tom, gives me much to consider. Many thanks. Maybe you could do a solo for me? I'm a lousy lead guitarist :D

Incidentally, how would I go about doing a pick up on the snare on Addictive Drums 2?

Edited by Keith Wilby

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1 hour ago, Keith Wilby said:

I go about doing a pick up on the snare on Addictive Drums 2?

I would drop a couple measures into the search function in EZD2 or SD3. Not being "flippant" here, I never bonded with AD2.
Pull everything out of the cwp: except the drum midi. Export an mp3 2-track mix, leave a marker at the "start" point for the imported audio.
I'm no "great shakes" on the acoustic, check the tune I have up, so I won't promise anything; but I'll have a run at it.
I'll throw the midi at EZD2 and see what we get...
email the cwp and mp3. add @aol.com to my screen name.

Tom

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Everything that needs to be said has been said so I will just say thanks for sharing and I will keep the furry ears out for the remix.

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