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kennywtelejazz

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kennywtelejazz last won the day on April 21 2019

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  1. Oh yeah I like the new overalls ...As long as I don't eat an egg salad sandwich I will be good to go ! Kenny
  2. It was .....The Air Quality of Portland has been Rated The Worst in The Planet . Since the air quality recently cleared up here in The Portland area , Now I have no freaking idea what we are talking about Since I'm a Man ! I ain't asking for directions . I don't want my Man Card Pulled ...🤪 Kenny
  3. You Da Man You sound like an interesting guy to take camping because the camp sight will be free of all bugs and critters .. We will have to remember to bring an extra tent just for you 👀 Kenny
  4. You should feel better Robert once you wash your eyes out with our healing waters . Kenny
  5. Like i said before I'm OK talking about a watermelon ....but that local chick ? forgetaboutit......if I ever went there I would take that INFO to the Grave with me . Kenny
  6. Who you gonna call to tap that ASSZZ Look no further you sexy green blob . Here's you guy ! Oh Man ! Jim Morrison was right when he sang the lyric People are Strange At least we are all safe for tonight and we can make it over the stonewall together for a change . Kenny
  7. 🤣 Actually I wouldn't mind getting a pair of those pants ...that hat has to go . Are those what you wear when you have your famous rooting patooting egg salad sandwiches ? Kenny
  8. Judging by the size of the hole it looks like somebody with a real small pecker took out their sexual frustrations on that thing ... I know it wasn't me because the last time I did something like that was before I got sober ( in 83 ) and it was with a watermelon .... Kenny
  9. Yes I hate to say it but the quarantine messed me up too ...Today I went to try on what used to be my fat pair of non stretch jeans and I was greeted with couple of inches of belly . There was no way for me to close the waistline and zip up the zipper ...Oh well it looks like it's gonna stay sweat pants and stretch jeans for now . I hope you have and use a bidet often because butt hole cleanliness is real important when you don't wear traditional pants ...more than once over the years I have caught a brown racing strip on the inside of my jeans ...yeah that might be TMI but I don't plan on marking my furniture with my but hole secretion's any time soon ... 🤣 Amen Brother you tell em . Kenny
  10. 🤣 I'm very lucky to have gotten the surgery the doctors did for me . I couldn't play the guitar for almost a year unless I only played in one fretting zone / area of the neck . That happened in 2009 and it was my introduction to sleeping on a Lazy Boy ... I would love to be a light weight again as far as my actual weight go's ...I kid you not , every time I hop on my scale I sing these words in my best atonal voice Tell me lies Tell me sweet little lies (Tell me lies, tell me, tell me lies) Remember Steven Seagal when he was a skinny and a tough looking bad ***** ? I used to be thin and in shape like him ....Now that he is all Porked Out and looking the way he does , I'm catching up to him there too. I may have to take the 25 pairs of jeans in assorted sizes I can no longer fit into anymore and just donate them to Good Will .. Kenny
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