Michael Vogel Posted October 9, 2020 Share Posted October 9, 2020 I didn’t want to pollute the puns thread so... Confession is good for... A woman takes a lover home during the day while her husband is at work. Her 9 year old son comes home unexpectedly, sees them and hides in the closet to watch. The woman’s husband also comes home unexpectedly so she puts her lover in the closet not realising her son is in there already. Boy: “Dark in here”. Man: “Yes, it is”. Boy: “I have a baseball..” Man: “That’s nice.” Boy: “Want to buy it?” Man: “No thanks.” Boy: “My dad’s outside.” Man: “OK, how much?” Boy: “$250.” Some time later, a repeat of these events brings the boy and the man together again in the closet. Boy: “Dark in here”. Man “Yes, it is”. Boy: “I have a baseball glove” Remembering the last time, Man: “How much?” Boy: “$750.“ Man: “Sold.” A few days later; Dad: “Grab your glove son, we’ll go outside and have a game of catch”. Boy: “I can’t, I sold my glove and ball.” Dad: “How much did you sell them for?” Boy: “$1,000;” Dad: “That’s terrible, over charging your friends like that, I’m taking you to church for confession.” On arriving at the church, dad sits the boy down in the confessional and shuts the door. Boy: “Dark in here”. Priest: Don’t start that s..t in here, you’re in my closet now.” 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Notes_Norton Posted October 9, 2020 Share Posted October 9, 2020 A blonde and a lawyer end up sitting together on a flight from NY to Chicago. The blonde just wants to sleep. The lawyer says, "Lets play a game to make the time pass. I'll ask a question, if you don't know the answer, you pay $5. Then it's your turn to ask." Blonde says, "No thanks. I just want to rest. Lawyer responds. "OK, I'll make it more interesting. If you don't know the answer, you pay $5.00 and if I don't know I'll pay you $50.00. This interests the blonds so she agrees. So the lawyer asks, "What is the capital of Qatar?" The blond silently reaches in her purse and hands the lawyer $5.00 and then asks, "What goes up a hill on 3 legs and comes down on 4?" Then she leans back and goes to sleep. Meanwhile the lawyer has his laptop out, he gets on his cell phone to call friends and is having no luck finding the answer. Finally when the plane starts its descent he wakes up the blonde, says, "OK you win" and hands her $50.00 About a minute later he asks, "OK, what goes up the hill on 3 legs and comes down on 4?" The blond silently opens her purse and hands the lawyer $5. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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