Lynn Wilson Posted December 25, 2022 Share Posted December 25, 2022 (edited) Merry Christmas to all my CW friends! I hope you're all well, and gearing up for a better year. Here is a song I wrote a few months ago, which I just put the finishing touches on. I'm finally ready for your opinions, advice, and suggestions. Without going into great detail, this song is about that one person in a family that just can't stay out of trouble, and drags others into their drama. This is my attempt to sugarcoat it without hiding the facts. I'm curious to know how it sounds to the casual observer. Thank you in advance for all your help! It can be found here: https://soundclick.com/r/s8m3nd Here are the lyrics: It just so happens that you’ve been here before You’re in no hurry to open that door There was a time when you just couldn’t wait You’re never early cause you’re usually too late Things are different now It’s funny that we change somehow Do you remember how I always had your back, I took the blame You always told me not to worry when you attack, it’s not the same Just as soon as you work up the nerve I’ll be happy just to throw you a curve Anything to upset your plans Unless you’re trying to get sober again It not the same as it was I’m less afraid to put up a fuss Did you think that you would always get your way? Have you no shame? And, now you’re crying because your life was thrown away? It’s not the same BRIDGE: You suddenly realize you’re past your prime Your fortune left you without a dime Now there’s no one left the hear your pleas And, you don’t know how to bend your knees Sometimes a person has to go it alone Life eventually wears you down to the bone It takes some courage to keep going on You better wake up before it’s all gone It all boils down to this Sometimes we swing, and sometimes we miss When life is harder than it’s ever been once more, alibis are lame You should belearning how to get up off the floor – do you know your name? Winter’s coming, and it’s closer day by day – stay near the flame You think it’s better if you don’t get in the way, but it’s not the same (It’s not the same 2x’s) Edited December 30, 2022 by Lynn Wilson 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bjornpdx Posted December 25, 2022 Share Posted December 25, 2022 I think I know that guy. The minor chords fit the lyrics very well. Great accompaniment and guitar work. The only suggestion I can come up with is the song needs a chorus that really stands out. Good job on this one Lynn. -Bjorn 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mark skinner Posted December 25, 2022 Share Posted December 25, 2022 This was pretty dark and convincing. It really put me on the edge of something I've felt before about someone over the edge. Very effective.. Take a close look at 2:14 and 3:39. I think there's a little unintended stutter step in both places. Good Job .. mark 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Supa Reels Posted December 27, 2022 Share Posted December 27, 2022 Great message performed well, have to say though the overall mix, to my aging ears, seemed a little muggy. it may well be my monitors ( or cans ) seemed the mid range was having all the bandwidth. Maybe, as Bjorn said 'a chorus ' not sure if that would suit the song though ..it's a big ask at this point anyway, so... Great work ATB Steve 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
KSband Posted December 27, 2022 Share Posted December 27, 2022 Good song, interesting details in there. I would bump the drums up just a little. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lynn Wilson Posted December 27, 2022 Author Share Posted December 27, 2022 Thanks to you all for your input! The chorus in this song is the section that ends with "it's not the same", but it is different in each verse. Not the typical approach. Mark, those times you pointed out are sections that have been juxtaposed, and may be a little jarring, though this was done by design. Something for me to consider. Steve, I am going for a warm mix with detail, but whether I achieved my goal is up to your ears (and others). And, to KSband, good idea! This is why I've been sitting on this song for months, and I'm glad to have so many talented ears to help. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
noynekker Posted December 28, 2022 Share Posted December 28, 2022 Very Interesting piece here Lynn ! a fiesta for the ears once again . . . no, it doesn't have that sing a long chorus others have mentioned, for me more of a philosophical journey. Your Soundclick page calls it "Alternate Rock (Indie)", but I hear it as a very jazz based idea, as it certainly morphs through different tempo and tonal allusions, and lyrical feelings. I knew from that first thick discord that I was in for something different. Enjoyed it very much, and huge respect for the recording / mix, to capture this idea ! 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jesse Screed Posted December 29, 2022 Share Posted December 29, 2022 To this casual listener it sounds great on my ear buds. As always the excellent guitar work. It sounds like there are some horns in there to, but it might just be your guitar. I have to listen again to get the story straight, but it seems like the kind of person you can't wait to leave the family gathering. What is the lyric at 3:20? I couldn't make it out but I would like to know. Nice work! 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
steve@baselines.com Posted December 29, 2022 Share Posted December 29, 2022 (edited) Really cool. It's got a touch of Elvis Costello and Randy Newman in there. Nice and tight. And interesting! Did you post this on Bandlab? If not, you should! Edited December 29, 2022 by steve@baselines.com extra 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bajan Blue Posted December 30, 2022 Share Posted December 30, 2022 Hi Lynn Like this - I agree with Steve, definitely a touch of Randy Newman in there - great guitar playing as always Cool Nigel 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lynn Wilson Posted December 30, 2022 Author Share Posted December 30, 2022 On 12/27/2022 at 10:15 PM, noynekker said: Very Interesting piece here Lynn ! a fiesta for the ears once again . . . no, it doesn't have that sing a long chorus others have mentioned, for me more of a philosophical journey. Your Soundclick page calls it "Alternate Rock (Indie)", but I hear it as a very jazz based idea, as it certainly morphs through different tempo and tonal allusions, and lyrical feelings. I knew from that first thick discord that I was in for something different. Enjoyed it very much, and huge respect for the recording / mix, to capture this idea ! Thank you for your input! I really don't like the genres that Soundclick forces you to use, but Indie might be the most appropriate. Your words are very encouraging! On 12/29/2022 at 9:54 AM, Jesse Screed said: To this casual listener it sounds great on my ear buds. As always the excellent guitar work. It sounds like there are some horns in there to, but it might just be your guitar. I have to listen again to get the story straight, but it seems like the kind of person you can't wait to leave the family gathering. What is the lyric at 3:20? I couldn't make it out but I would like to know. Nice work! Hi Jesse! Thank you for your kind words. No horns in this one, but I did use a different guitar that I normally use: a 1992 Epiphone Sheraton. It has a wide palette of tones. I put up the lyrics in my original post to answer your question. And, you're right about the family gathering scenario! 19 hours ago, steve@baselines.com said: Really cool. It's got a touch of Elvis Costello and Randy Newman in there. Nice and tight. And interesting! Did you post this on Bandlab? If not, you should! Thanks for you thoughts and time, Steve! I've only posted on Bandlab a few times, but maybe it's time again? Again, thanks for the compliment. 3 hours ago, Bajan Blue said: Hi Lynn Like this - I agree with Steve, definitely a touch of Randy Newman in there - great guitar playing as always Cool Nigel Thank you, Nigel, for raising the bar so high around here. There are so many people here getting better all the time that it's hard to keep up. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Makke Posted February 8, 2023 Share Posted February 8, 2023 Cool! I liked the melody and vocs. Nice arrangement and sounds.👍 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lynn Wilson Posted February 9, 2023 Author Share Posted February 9, 2023 On 2/8/2023 at 9:13 AM, Makke said: Cool! I liked the melody and vocs. Nice arrangement and sounds.👍 Thanks, Makke, for your detective work in finding this post from the past! This was a fun project from start to finish. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
freddy j Posted February 9, 2023 Share Posted February 9, 2023 I don't know how I missed this one but I'm glad that it came back up to where I could find it. Wow, this is a great song! The lyrics really tell a story. They sound a bit cathartic? Your vocals present the lyrics very well. Your guitar work really complements the story. The guitars and your arrangement set an edge that helps situate the story. Excellent work my friend!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lynn Wilson Posted February 9, 2023 Author Share Posted February 9, 2023 7 hours ago, freddy j said: I don't know how I missed this one but I'm glad that it came back up to where I could find it. Wow, this is a great song! The lyrics really tell a story. They sound a bit cathartic? Your vocals present the lyrics very well. Your guitar work really complements the story. The guitars and your arrangement set an edge that helps situate the story. Excellent work my friend!! Thanks, Fred, now I'm blushing But, I gotta tell ya, the level of talent around this place makes me want to try harder just to stay near the crew. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Paul Bush Posted February 12, 2023 Share Posted February 12, 2023 Hi Lynn So much in there , lots going on in the background great song and ``its not the same´´ cheers paul Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ruralrocker2010 Posted February 12, 2023 Share Posted February 12, 2023 The first minute or so the piano and bass were very thick in the mid-range which took away from the clarity of the vocal which was delivered well. The overtones then hung on which distracted me and made me draw my attention to the drums - which made me feel like there's either a mix (volumes) issue or an overcompression. I felt like the drums weren't as sonically good as the other instruments and I didn't understand why. So, that's really what gave me the overcompression idea. The guitar work is stellar. So many nuance riffs and stabs that were very cool to listen to. The bassline is also very well delivered. If you wanted to try an alternate mix, I'd pull the bass back about 3-6 db to bring it within a db or 2 of the kick. Then, that piano or organ, I would, pull it back just a touch & eq out 400-800 to take out some of the boxy-fatness and then bump the vocal up a bit. Leave the guitars as is. But - that's all just preference stuff. Lynn your stuff is always good work. The instruments sound really good and everythin g is so well done. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lynn Wilson Posted February 15, 2023 Author Share Posted February 15, 2023 On 2/12/2023 at 1:20 PM, Paul Bush said: Hi Lynn So much in there , lots going on in the background great song and ``its not the same´´ cheers paul Thanks Paul! I appreciate your time! On 2/12/2023 at 5:31 PM, Ruralrocker2010 said: The first minute or so the piano and bass were very thick in the mid-range which took away from the clarity of the vocal which was delivered well. The overtones then hung on which distracted me and made me draw my attention to the drums - which made me feel like there's either a mix (volumes) issue or an overcompression. I felt like the drums weren't as sonically good as the other instruments and I didn't understand why. So, that's really what gave me the overcompression idea. The guitar work is stellar. So many nuance riffs and stabs that were very cool to listen to. The bassline is also very well delivered. If you wanted to try an alternate mix, I'd pull the bass back about 3-6 db to bring it within a db or 2 of the kick. Then, that piano or organ, I would, pull it back just a touch & eq out 400-800 to take out some of the boxy-fatness and then bump the vocal up a bit. Leave the guitars as is. But - that's all just preference stuff. Lynn your stuff is always good work. The instruments sound really good and everythin g is so well done. Joshua, I can tell you really took time to hear this with such a detailed reply. Try as I might, I don't quite hear the issues you're talking about. It is something that I'll take into consideration when I get back to this song. It would help to know what you are listening through, I may have something similar. Thanks so much for your time and effort! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ruralrocker2010 Posted February 15, 2023 Share Posted February 15, 2023 @Lynn Wilson I want to give this a couple listens through my other speakers. I was using my smaller 5in monitors. Can you email me the wav file and I can look inside my daw? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Boomin36Beatz Posted February 27, 2023 Share Posted February 27, 2023 (edited) I like the Guitar variations . Your voice is Great and you know that you are good. by the way i listened to another track from you called dont take candy. All i can say is fantastic. !!!The Message!!! Edited February 27, 2023 by Boomin36Beatz 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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