Jump to content
Sign in to follow this  
Vernon Barnes

Susan's Dream Preview. NEW MIX

Recommended Posts

Posted (edited)

Here is a preview mix of a track from my new Red Over Red project. It is the third song in a song cycle  "The Slyboots Incident" which tells the story of the death of my Great Great Grandfather and his crew in a collision at sea in 1881.  My Great Great Grandmother was reported in in contemporary newspaper articles as having seen the incident in a dream.  Seven year old Osman thought he heard his father come home during the night of the accident. Also killed in the incident was her son from her first marriage. 

I am posting on Soundcloud for a short time as a preview.

The song features Gina Ellen on vocals and James Alden Lawrence on guitar.   I am waiting on a bit more guitar to replace the faux guitar in the string/guitar instrumental section before the "middle 8".

Due to COVID I have not had chance to try this mix in as many environments as I would like. Off Soundcloud on my laptop with headphones its now sounding a little harsh. The final mix will be done in context of the surrounding songs which are still in production.

 

Edited by Vernon Barnes

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Well I don't get to hear much music with this very independent sense of melody and lyrical cadence. It's unique and we need so much more of this originality. Well done in the writing department!

By your comments I read you aren't really done with the mix and I think that's a fair observation. If it were mine I'd get more delay or perhaps reverb on the vocal. Apart, obviously, from your already effected sections.

She really has a great vocal tone! I did wonder if melodyne might have some use in a couple of spots, but because your melody is unconventional, I could just be all wet there. (like Richard)

thanks, that was a very original work and a satisfying listen.

cheers,

-Tom

  • Like 2

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Posted (edited)

Got interrupted on my first listen, and listening again I think Tom is spot on.

Fine bit of story telling here for sure.

Little crit; Not sure the drums are "in the room" with the rest of the instruments.

t

Oh, and I'd put a moments silence on the front end, kind of an abrupt start...

Edited by DeeringAmps
added comment

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Posted (edited)

Thanks for the kind comments and suggestions.  I have received the remaining guitar parts and some very detailed observations on the mix from James, the guitarist, so things are moving forward and its starting to sound better. I will leave this version up there for a while.

In case anyone is interested in the back story here is a transcription of the article that appeared in the local paper "Dartmouth Chronical" and the regional paper "The Cornishman" shortly after the incident.

Quote

LOSS OF BRIXHAM TRAWLER AND CREW. A STRANGE DREAM.

The trawler Sly Boots, of Brixham, has been run down by the steamer Compton, from New Orleans for Reval which put into Dartmouth on Thursday. Captain Cowle stated that he had been in collision with a fishing ketch. Another fishing boat observed a vessel steaming over the place of the accident, as if searching for the hapless crew. The Brixham fishermen describe the night as a fine starlight one, and at the time of the collision there were upwards of a hundred trawlers with their trawls down within an area of three miles. It is also stated that a flare-up was observed, which suddenly went out, leaving the masthead light burning, which minute afterwards also disappeared, after which a steamer's whistle was heard, and the steamer then became visible to several of the trawlers, but spoke to none of them, which, it is asserted, might have easily been done. The names of the missing crew are Richard Barnes, master and owner, who leaves a widow (whose former husband was drowned at Hull twelve years ago) and three young children; Daniel Ward, who leaves a widow and four little children totally unprovided for; an apprentice named Samuel Parnell, a native of Torquay; Harry Howe, son of the wife of the master by her first husband; and George Cole, an apprentice on trial, a native of Brixham. The Sly Boots was insured in the Fishing Smack Insurance Society for £250.

In connection with the melancholy affair there is a strange story, which there seems no reason for discrediting. the same night the Sly Boots was lost Mrs. Barnes, the wife the owner, dreamed that she was standing a rock, and saw a steamer run into the boat, and that she to her husband, " Richard, save the boy," meaning her son, Harry Howe. It that the dream powerfully affected her that she did scream, as she simultaneously awoke.

Another mysterious incident also mentioned. At six o'clock the morning, a few hours after the dream, Osman Barnes, a boy of seven years, came into his mother's bedroom, and asked for his father, for, as he told his mother, he knew he was home, for he distinctly heard him come up the steps, with his sea-boots on. and kick at the door, as he did when he came home from Lowestoft, and after he came in the clock struck three.

The singular coincidence of this incident with her own dream, which was startling in its apparent reality that she could not rid herself of the thought that some disaster had befallen her husband and son, so alarmed the poor woman that immediately after she got up the told the circumstances to neighbour, who tried to re-assure her by treating the matter as mere fancy. The narration the incident took place the morning and no intelligence of the disaster was brought until the night, and the boat was not overdue she was not expected home, there seems be no natural explanation of the mystery.

 

Edited by Vernon Barnes

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

That was "chilling" indeed. I can't wait to hear a further mix. Awesome story and writing.  Highly impressed ..  mark

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Posted (edited)

Very well done as a story to music and a most tragic one at that. I love the arrangement, the vocalist is a very good fit. The guitar solo sort of took this more into the rock category. The solo  guitar would be an acquired taste for me. Since it was a planned departure I see the reason for it.

The entire mix sounded a little on the dry side to me. Possibly some stereo spring delay on the solo guitar would liven it up. Something like the Waves H delay in stereo.

The vocals could use some reverb as well. I didn't think the mix was harsh, but then I tend to like my mixes with more mid range and less soft quality. You could go either way on the master with this mix.  

I think you already addressed that you are working on these things so my comments are likely redundant. Amazing how different some mixes sound once uploaded compared to how they sound in the studio, even using the proper monitor/room correction techniques.

Congratulations to all involved in this. Nice work!

Edited by Starise

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

This is a haunting song and is certainly unique!  This is a gem waiting to be polished.  I like the singer's voice and her emotive quality, though I agree with Tom that Melodyne might find a use here.  I hear very good stereo panning left to right, but I'm missing the front to rear depth.  That is, I'm hearing it strictly two dimensional on first impression.  I like the song so much that I'll listen to this several more times, and all in all, this is a very good song.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Posted (edited)

Thanks again for your kind comments and suggestions.

Things have moved on an I have replaced the file with a new mix. I have done a very quick master using the Ozone 8 assistant for streaming.

I plan to leave this on Soundcloud for a week and then take it down. A final mix and master will be done once the other songs in the cycle are completed.  I am also planning to go right back to the comping stage and redo the vocal production and final mixing in my newly acquired Studio One, a) as a learning process and b) in the hope I may manage a better mix.

The plan at the moment is to put the final "EP" on Bandcamp (without too much hope of many sales) and maybe make a few CD to try to sell locally, pushing the strong local story.

 

 

 

Edited by Vernon Barnes

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Love the idea of turning family history into a song (and I just noticed the last name of the captain is the same as yours)
I heard the previous version and I thought the voc needed some reverb/delay and pitch correction but I'm not noticing that in this version.


Seems like it would be a difficult song for a vocalist but your singer pulls it off nicely. However I had trouble understanding maybe half the words but
my ears ain't what they used to be. Pronunciation of some words seemed awkward like the singer was trying to fit too many words into a measure.


Anyway, just my opinion. You have a great story to tell. Your distant relatives had no idea their great great grandson would write a song about them.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Good song - do agree the drums don't sound right to me - apart from that, good stuff

Nigel

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

That's quite a good song you have here - a very pleasant listen and it tells the story you described. I agree with some of the comments above regarding the drums - they don't seem to fit in the mix. Impressive lead vocal.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Please sign in to comment

You will be able to leave a comment after signing in



Sign In Now
Sign in to follow this  

×
×
  • Create New...