Jump to content
Notes_Norton

Puns Anyone? Got 'em? Post 'em.

Recommended Posts

3 hours ago, Notes_Norton said:

loosewheel-jpg.108673

Used to hear Daryl Waltrip sing that too often during NASCAR races, but my mind's just trying to imagine how much torque was required to break the axle in that image!!! 😮

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
5 hours ago, craigb said:

Used to hear Daryl Waltrip sing that too often during NASCAR races, but my mind's just trying to imagine how much torque was required to break the axle in that image!!! 😮

Definitely popped a wheelie!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Reminds me of the time I decided to become an archeologist!  My career ended up in ruins...

  • Like 1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
5 minutes ago, Mandolin Picker said:

1342363822_AirandSpaceMuseum.thumb.jpg.2aec79f6685544f17acac33bc9a9bc0f.jpg

I have this strange desire to visit! 😁

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

There's a fine line between a numerator and a denominator.

 

Only a fraction of people will find this funny.

  • Like 2

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Being a math guy, I've always loved those jokes.  Here, have the meme!

Math-FractionalMathHumor.jpg

  • Like 2

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

BTW - My math teacher tried to say I was just average, but she was just being mean! 😜

  • Like 1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

C, E-flat and G go into a bar. The bartender says, "Sorry, we don't serve minors," and E-flat leaves. C and G have an open fifth between them. After a few drinks, the fifth is diminished and G is out flat. F comes in and tries to augment the situation, but is not sharp enough. D comes into the bar and heads straight for the bathroom saying, "Excuse me, I'll just be a second."

A comes into the bar, but the bartender is not convinced that this relative of C is not a minor and sends him out. Then the bartender notices a B-flat hiding at the end of the bar and shouts, "Get out now. You're the seventh minor I've found in this bar tonight."

Next night, E-flat, not easily deflated, comes into the bar in a 3-piece suit with nicely shined shoes. The bartender says: "You're looking pretty sharp tonight. Come on in. This could be a major development." Sure enough, E-flat takes off his suit and everything else and stands there au naturel.

Eventually, C, who had passed out under the bar the night before, begins to sober up and realizes in horror that he's under a rest. So, C goes to trial, is convicted of contributing to the diminution of a minor and sentenced to 10 years of DS without Coda at an up scale correctional facility. The conviction is overturned on appeal, however, and C is found innocent of any wrongdoing, even accidental, and that all accusations to the contrary are bassless.

The bartender decides, however, that since he's only had tenor so patrons, the soprano out in the bathroom, and everything has become alto much treble, he needs a rest and closes the bar.

  • Haha 1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
39 minutes ago, Notes_Norton said:

C, E-flat and G go into a bar. The bartender says, "Sorry, we don't serve minors," and E-flat leaves. C and G have an open fifth between them. After a few drinks, the fifth is diminished and G is out flat. F comes in and tries to augment the situation, but is not sharp enough. D comes into the bar and heads straight for the bathroom saying, "Excuse me, I'll just be a second."

A comes into the bar, but the bartender is not convinced that this relative of C is not a minor and sends him out. Then the bartender notices a B-flat hiding at the end of the bar and shouts, "Get out now. You're the seventh minor I've found in this bar tonight."

Next night, E-flat, not easily deflated, comes into the bar in a 3-piece suit with nicely shined shoes. The bartender says: "You're looking pretty sharp tonight. Come on in. This could be a major development." Sure enough, E-flat takes off his suit and everything else and stands there au naturel.

Eventually, C, who had passed out under the bar the night before, begins to sober up and realizes in horror that he's under a rest. So, C goes to trial, is convicted of contributing to the diminution of a minor and sentenced to 10 years of DS without Coda at an up scale correctional facility. The conviction is overturned on appeal, however, and C is found innocent of any wrongdoing, even accidental, and that all accusations to the contrary are bassless.

The bartender decides, however, that since he's only had tenor so patrons, the soprano out in the bathroom, and everything has become alto much treble, he needs a rest and closes the bar.

Very nice, very nice. I C what You did there, You ought to be suspended.

  • Thanks 1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
3 hours ago, RobertWS said:

Stealing Borrowing Puns are his forte.

Fixed! 😁

(However, to be fair, I originally stole it way back in 2006 and last posted it in 2009...  The PROOF!  😜  )

  • Like 1
  • Haha 1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
8 hours ago, Notes_Norton said:

A bad punner steals, a good punner borrows, and there isn't much difference between the two.

Now I have a song going through my head...  "Baaad on the pun!😆

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Please sign in to comment

You will be able to leave a comment after signing in



Sign In Now

×
×
  • Create New...