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craigb

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Everything posted by craigb

  1. Wow, what a crappy thing to say!!! 💩 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
  2. Well, for those guys, it can be a lot easier (and cheaper!). Most can have any background they want as long as they start with one of these:
  3. Hehe... Steve misspelled "Shame!"
  4. *Pfft!* You're just miffed that they called you John #438! 😜
  5. Well, I was a DJ from '80 thru '83...
  6. Wait... Is Zo implying that he's NOT a DJ??? 🤔 😜
  7. More! I guess I made a few of these... No wonder my projects tended to be turned in late... 😁 A dove stands for peace But the bird of a true love Would be a swallow He was so stupid That He couldn't even get "Hello World" to run! Start with a face-off... But it's not a hockey game It's Leper Boxing! You don't need science Or a psychic projection To tell that I'm bored Let's go to Graceland To see our buddy Elvis I'll bring some shovels (Leper Haiku anyone? 😜 ) The leper farmer Was walking through the corn fields And found lots of ears The comedian Performing for the lepers Received a big hand The leper actress Was told to go break a leg But didn't have one An eye for an eye! The leper rebel shouted So they threw him one In a leper race It is usual to be A head by a foot Are your feelings hurt? That wasn't my intention Here, have a tissue. Skydiving is fun Unless you try to pack light And forget your chute A flexible man, One could tell from how his head Was stuck up his a55 He yelled, I drew: That's the difference between The quick and the dead Stop it already! You are driving me crazy With all this haiku! They were arrested Were George Michael and Pee Wee Both caught red-handed Yes, relative time Is a whole lot more fun than Time with relatives! My future is past When, just like Christmas, I Unwrap the present Fat girls can be fun Put your meat in their ovens And see microwaves! No harps, just Haiku Made Steve think "Well, if I'm dead... This isn't Heaven!" 😁
  8. Selected horrible Haiku from many years ago (some of what we used to do when we were supposed to be programming! 😁 ). Many have stumbled On the path to victory I call them losers The top of your head Is easy for me to see Since you have no legs The smiling psychic Could really define the term "Happy Medium" I hate the sea birds That gather all around me And shit on my shirt Although it's been said That a stitch in time saves nine I say "Use Velcro!" The kids on the beach Were like small pictures of joy So I blew them up My new house has walls That are off-white and padded Will you come visit? The knife came towards me And spread me from side to side I was on a roll And now I can't stop Counting five, seven and five And it's all your fault! Listen to reason But take care to remember Ears can deceive you You reap what you sow But a few will go farther And sew what they rip What sound a tree makes When it falls in a forest Is up to the tree A thought cast will skip Off the minds of the shallow But sinks in the deep Many opinions Are constructed by the wise And sold by the fool Timothy Leary Turned reality into Unreality Depressing people Float away from my conscience Like ships on the sea An optimist feels That the sands of time gathered Would make a nice beach. Many have conquered All foes they have encountered But time takes them all As long as a man Is in love with his body No one else will be When somebody says Nobody does it like you They're probably right A politician Is just like a stable boy They both shovel crap The fellow who hides Under an outhouse's seat Will see lots of shit Any who compare The size of one's balls to strength Have not been kicked there Sally the spoon and Freddy the fork went no where Unlike Mack the knife It is said that those Who seek for higher meaning Will often find it It is said that those Who only seek to get high Will often do it Echoes from within Patterns of the universe Order from Chaos Enclosed in a sphere The minute mimics the great: Singularity Schroedinger came by To ask how my half-life was Then he stole my cat! Would it smell so sweet If it was known as a fart? A rose is a rose To know is to be But to be or not to be Is to know Shakespeare
  9. I was expecting something from Bob Ross! 😁
  10. About the router, you'll want to consider the shape of the broadcast from the antennas. I've seen people kill their signal by putting the routers in non-standard places or by tilting the antennas incorrectly. I had a friend accidentally put his so HE got almost no signal, but the hack-kiddies out by the street got all they wanted!
  11. One half of that ancient Chinese philosophy with Ping? 🤔😜
  12. No, but then I haven't had a dog for over 45 years either... 😁
  13. Now, now Kenny... As someone who actually used to dance at Chippendale's, I don't recall ever hearing about you! 😜
  14. First thing that came to my mind too! 😁
  15. I've tested positive for MOVID (motivational difficulties).
  16. Yeah, I ran into that ages ago which is why all of my stuff is kept in subdirectories of a couple of domains that I own. I simply use Filezilla to upload and link from there. For now, upload it here and link to that! 🙂
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